お誕生日おめでとう
京さん!!!
And even though I want to write so many things... the words refurse to come.
If only I could hold you close and tell you in person...
In Kyoto there's a temple, it's called the 三十三間堂 (Sanjuusangen-dou), the "Hall with thirty three spaces between columns"
Once you said that one of those statues resembled your face. And do you know why Kannon has a thousand arms?
Because he (or she, depending on the region) is merciful and helps people with all those arms.
If you were him, your voice would be your arms.
This is the single most unwanted day every year in my life.
Honestly, I could just last without it.Valentine's is too anglo-saxon for Hungary but we make a fad out of everything shiny and American (even though this celebration is actually of British origin).
And the bitter aftertaste in my mouth is not because I have no Valentine to share this day with, because back when I had somebody, I specifically told him not to buy me anything on this day. Just no, a big fat no.If I love someone I'm intented to do as I please and "reward" him on any day of the year, anytime I feel like it, not just on dumb February 14.
Yet, many people have accused me over the years that it's because I have no one special that I can be together with is the reason why I hate this day so much.
They are wrong.Like I said, even if I had someone I wouldn't celebrate it. It's not inherent to the culture I was brought up in. It's of course another thing how many cheap and gay kitsch gets put on display in the stores. Makes me wanna throw up.
And don't you dare send me anything! This goes to those unsuspecting males out there who might have this in mind. Not that any of them is on my f.list as far as I know, but I'm confident that there are guys drooling after me. And they all want something they actually cannot have. "Can't be touched, won't be touched."
And it's not because I'm heartless or evil (okay, I admit that I can be evil), it's because these guys just don't have what it takes to make my heart beat faster. To put it simply: they suck.
Plus there's this inferior feeling Valentine's day left in me when I was a child: I was never the ultimate cute little girl nor the model-type teenager, in short, I was never one to draw much attention onto myself. There have been popular girls, true, but this feeling of inferiority didn't develop because I was jealous of them. Oh no. It was because they made fun of me. We always had these school radio programs on V-day where boys could send their messages to girls and vica versa. I never got a single one but I couldn't care less. Until one year a clique started to make fun of me because of this.
I was stigmatized because I never got a message on the school radio or a single flower from someone secretly. I was fine with that, never cared too much to be bothered by the fact until I had my classmates' fingers pointed at my back. And it continued in high school as well. Tell you what: it sucked.
And it made me absolutely bitter toward this day in the calender. And it made me never ever to want to celebrate it with anyone. Never in my life.
And if anybody would decide to send me a gift, a letter, a greeting card, a text message or an e-mail - well, all I can say is they are doomed and ruined all their chances they might have ever had to go out with me. Because I'm twisted like that and have bad childhood memories. Or is it because it would annoy me out of my right mind if someone cared when I didn't? Difficult question but it roughly boils down to the same thing: I hate Valentine's Day with such a passion that could be considered fury or even rage.
On another note: soon in Japan it'll be the birthday of someone special!
Honestly, I could just last without it.Valentine's is too anglo-saxon for Hungary but we make a fad out of everything shiny and American (even though this celebration is actually of British origin).
And the bitter aftertaste in my mouth is not because I have no Valentine to share this day with, because back when I had somebody, I specifically told him not to buy me anything on this day. Just no, a big fat no.If I love someone I'm intented to do as I please and "reward" him on any day of the year, anytime I feel like it, not just on dumb February 14.
Yet, many people have accused me over the years that it's because I have no one special that I can be together with is the reason why I hate this day so much.
They are wrong.Like I said, even if I had someone I wouldn't celebrate it. It's not inherent to the culture I was brought up in. It's of course another thing how many cheap and gay kitsch gets put on display in the stores. Makes me wanna throw up.
And don't you dare send me anything! This goes to those unsuspecting males out there who might have this in mind. Not that any of them is on my f.list as far as I know, but I'm confident that there are guys drooling after me. And they all want something they actually cannot have. "Can't be touched, won't be touched."
And it's not because I'm heartless or evil (okay, I admit that I can be evil), it's because these guys just don't have what it takes to make my heart beat faster. To put it simply: they suck.
Plus there's this inferior feeling Valentine's day left in me when I was a child: I was never the ultimate cute little girl nor the model-type teenager, in short, I was never one to draw much attention onto myself. There have been popular girls, true, but this feeling of inferiority didn't develop because I was jealous of them. Oh no. It was because they made fun of me. We always had these school radio programs on V-day where boys could send their messages to girls and vica versa. I never got a single one but I couldn't care less. Until one year a clique started to make fun of me because of this.
I was stigmatized because I never got a message on the school radio or a single flower from someone secretly. I was fine with that, never cared too much to be bothered by the fact until I had my classmates' fingers pointed at my back. And it continued in high school as well. Tell you what: it sucked.
And it made me absolutely bitter toward this day in the calender. And it made me never ever to want to celebrate it with anyone. Never in my life.
And if anybody would decide to send me a gift, a letter, a greeting card, a text message or an e-mail - well, all I can say is they are doomed and ruined all their chances they might have ever had to go out with me. Because I'm twisted like that and have bad childhood memories. Or is it because it would annoy me out of my right mind if someone cared when I didn't? Difficult question but it roughly boils down to the same thing: I hate Valentine's Day with such a passion that could be considered fury or even rage.
On another note: soon in Japan it'll be the birthday of someone special!
Today was my birthday, as you know. I received tons of text messages and online greetings.
It makes me very happy to know so many people care about me.
I only had one class in the afternoon, so I slept until 11 am. After that I watched Dir en grey's Wacken Live performance on DVD during lunch
When I finished in school I called up my friend, Ayami, and we met up at the mall. I bought two new tops and a new scarf, and we met with some random Dir en grey fans. I never met them before but they were kind and also wished me a happy birthday so I guess it was okay ( ´艸｀)
Then we went to the other mall, downtown, to have fried prawn. I love fried prawn o(^▽^)o
And there we met my friend, Adri, so we stayed and talked at the dining area until 7 pm.
Coming home with Ayami we took a long walk and it was snowing!
I managed to snap a picture with my cell phone:
Western Railway Station in Budapest, in the evening with heavy snow
We went in to a McDonald's (what else, right?
) and bought two pies with raspberry jam and chocolat and ate it while walking. It was very delicious.
Finally, we got on a bus and came home. I'm very tired now and I have to dry my Converse because it sokaed through. (＞_＜)
But my first class tomorrow morning was cancelled, so I won't have to get up at 6 am.
(^з^)-☆Chu!!
It makes me very happy to know so many people care about me.
I only had one class in the afternoon, so I slept until 11 am. After that I watched Dir en grey's Wacken Live performance on DVD during lunch
When I finished in school I called up my friend, Ayami, and we met up at the mall. I bought two new tops and a new scarf, and we met with some random Dir en grey fans. I never met them before but they were kind and also wished me a happy birthday so I guess it was okay ( ´艸｀)
Then we went to the other mall, downtown, to have fried prawn. I love fried prawn o(^▽^)o
And there we met my friend, Adri, so we stayed and talked at the dining area until 7 pm.
Coming home with Ayami we took a long walk and it was snowing!
I managed to snap a picture with my cell phone:
Western Railway Station in Budapest, in the evening with heavy snow
We went in to a McDonald's (what else, right?
) and bought two pies with raspberry jam and chocolat and ate it while walking. It was very delicious.Finally, we got on a bus and came home. I'm very tired now and I have to dry my Converse because it sokaed through. (＞_＜)
But my first class tomorrow morning was cancelled, so I won't have to get up at 6 am.
(^з^)-☆Chu!!
(These are the flowers I got from mom, granny, and dad. Back at home, in my room.)
I am officially 22 years old!
I feel sooo old, you have no idea but actually I'm just very tired.
Here's why:
I went in to 8 am, for 10 minutes, for 10 fucking minutes!
I had breakfast at McDonald's.I went to class by 10 and the class was held.
I returned to the same McDobald's to have lunch.
Went back to class: we waited in Room 206 because the class was supposed to be held there. The whole seminar group was there, but the teacher didn't come. So a guy went to ask where the teacher is...and it turned out that she changed the room to 424 and she waited there. But she went home, tired of waiting for us...
素晴しい
Had a class at 5 pm which was also held. Now I feel like dying but at least I will only have one class tomorrow, in the afternoon.
And I wanted to take a picture for the blog but people were looking at me odd. My university is in the absolute inner city and the streetcars are "back on track" after almost 2 years and it looked nice, despite the snowy rain. Ah well, I shall try to snap a picture for you guys tomorrow. ('-^*)/