What happened to me?

It's been a while I am writing a blog.

I always fine after graduating high school until my sophomore.

But recently I feel so stressed.

A lot of tasks and assignment.

I know it's my duty while being a student, university student.

But this feeling never gone.

As I recall my memories about my past....

I realize that I rarely go outside the house, not that I am antisocial since my Junior high school.

I rarely hangout to relax myself.

I always at home doing house cleaning.

Yeah I always worried that my mother will end up angry at me.

My sister has a job already.

My twin sister is a university activist, she is busier than me.

My brother is still a junior high school. He always play outside the house.

I also take a part in University Organization.

But in Media Information department and a language tutor.

Maybe I less busy than them.

My twin sister always go outside (hangout) or have a meeting with their friends on weekend.

My sister sometimes doing the overwork on weekend or hangout with her old friend.

I end up giving up to them, let they go hanging out, I am at home helping mother and father.

I always end up at home doing house cleaning again and again...

Washing the dishes, sweeping, washing the clothes, ironing the clothes, and etc.

I wash the hole family clothes.

I always have the thought that they are more busy than me, so I let them be.

The more I let them be, the more I get tired.

I do that alone.

Sometimes I asked for a help to my sister and twin sister.

"Can you help me to iron five pieces of clothes of mother and father? I am tired"

They dont answer me.

Then I gave the five pieces to my sister and twin sister.

They never iron it. They only iron their own clothes.

They always do that.

I end up doing that alone.

I end up being so sad.

I end up being angry.

But I dont know how to let them know.

I once got angry to them for not helping me.

They end up got angry at me too.

After that I always hold up my feelings.

But I cant hold it anymore.

I want they help me and realized it by themselves. But I dont want to tell it and I dont want to they help me. It makes me angry in my heart.

It really affect me.

Everytime I go outside the house, even if I only go to university for school, I am so happy.