giving you a big love


i never thought of being a friend with my ex.

but it seems that i could carry it on.

split up, that is what i've been thinking for a while and i did it at last.

too scrared to do that, however, i could not come to deal with

this distracting, stressful and worrying life.

i said everything i've been thinking so far.

and i can't believe the way i was since at that time, i was really candid and still trying to choose thoughtful words to convey my feeling to him.

did i hesitate to have done that or what.

maybe it was the latter.

he was the one i was cherishing and it's never different even when he is just a friend right now.

i can/could not be with him anyway.

it always comes up to my mind that what the relationship means to me.

it's kinda weird, but i feel like giving him love ever than before.

could call him sweetie, send him an email, talk to me from myself on IM.

and realized it was my pleasure too to give that kinda stuff.

i should have learnt a bit how to give and take.

never trapped into my cage. i will be the one who can.